Clocking in. Post post
Clocking in. Post post
OBLIGATORY BORING INTRODUCTION
*sniffles* ... ... *sniffles* ... allergies suck. What causes allergies? What are the effects of allergies? Why can't I be around cats?
FIZZLE FAZZLE PUDDING POP STORY FEATURING BILL COSBY
You see children, pudding pop, allergies exist deep within you, not unlike a tampon or a very used dildo. In fact, allergies are actually in your blood, not unlike the drugs coursing through your veins THIS VERY MOMENT EVERYONE KNOWS!!!!
When you come in contact with an external allergic stimuli, your blood volatility will react in such a way that may produce an array of reactions. The bulk of reactions involve inflammation of certain areas which may cause problems breathing, rashes, sneezing, joint pain, vomiting, headaches, the whole pudding pop.
This last weekend I went to a friend's house to watch the western conference finals (The Spurs blew the Thunder out of the water btw, it wasn't even a game worth watching.) I found myself suffocating and sneezing like a maniac after I started petting Captain Starbuck, the cat, the nemesis. Well Captain Starbuck caught on, and then he jumped on me and wouldn't get off. A narrow brush with the grim reaper for sure.
Antihistamines help alleviate such allergic reactions, but continual usage of antihistamines will eventually cause irregular blood pressure, and in old age problems with blood clots (see death). So what is the long term solution of allergies?
How do we eradicate allergies once and for all?
There is a solution, although it's very scientific I will try to write as succinctly as possible, pudding pop.
Kill All Cats.
F.Y.I. - there are 20 posts per page. We need to make it to page 250 or 500 depending on the true post count.
watta nub using 20 post pages
Crypt's Useful Advice on Increasing Posts Per Page:
Cannot be found
when did I ever say I was gonna offer advice x.x
Measly reps for advice
Mic Check One Two One Two
Two Chicks At Once Is What I Wanna Do
Word.
post
^ Your avatar is dancing with your gif
Is this the line for the intergalactic giant robot smackdown?
Here's to hoping I am the victor
It's Prince Habeeboo!
I'm so exhausted... I don't think my body can take any more partying
Youth is wasted on the young! Get off my lawn!
So I just sent a voice not via whatsapp to this woman I want to date. Spill my guts for 2 minutes. Expecting such a rewarding response. Then I receive "Hey your voice message didn't work, I think you had your hand on the speaker" So pissed but I can't do it twice. It's like when you're typing up an essay and your power runs out. You just wrote the most magnificently formulated structure that is now lost, it can never be done the same way again. Maybe I can do it better... 0_0
New Goal, help Frog formulate a love note
Structure:
1. Greeting
2. Compliment
3. Memory of last night
4. Passion
5. Relevant upcoming event regarding passion
6. Compliment sex
7. Dick Pic
Ok, To resume the love letter break down.
I will:
-Greeting - "Ay Bay"
-What I've been doing - "Helped clean up the trashed house, picked up easily 200 cigarettes, kicked out the partiers who wouldn't leave, slept for 99999 hours, went to work with the biggest smile on my face"
-Compliment & Recall Memory - "You are the most comfortable small spoon ever. I think we have what it takes to win the gold in olympic spooning, but we're going to need more practice."
-Passion - "Maybe we can work on it next weekend, but first there's this thing I've wanted to do for almost a year and I still haven't done it! When was the last time you've been to a waterpark...?"
-Relevant Upcoming event regarding passion - "We bought a packet of waterpark passes starting next weekend at Atlantis Dubai on the Palm, you in?"
-Compliment sex - "O BTW, bring that sexy lingerie you wore last night- We all took a vote on best swim suit and with an overwhelming 10/10 jaws dropped your lingerie won."
-Dick Pick - "Haha, I'm going to stop talking about it because you're going to have me drooling like a fool. Looking forward to this weekend beautiful woman. I'm forwarding you a goofy pic of us from last week."
Story not related to woman above*
******
I met this gorgeous woman the other day; she's young, gorgeous, eastern european, educationally motivated (she has a masters, planning on going back for a PHD), career motivated (she works for a huge company over here), AND she's the opposite of a party girl. She came to a party the other day and left to go to a baby shower with local women. She told me about her philosophy on relationships (supporting your partner) etc. she seems very legit.
So I invite her to a wine and cheese night at my country club. The first thing that came to mind as I sit across this classy sophisticated woman at the fine establishment with an incredible selection of cheeses and wines:
"So... who cut the cheese?"
She laughs
"I did sir" - says the dude with a chefs hat who clearly doesn't speak english well
Everyone at the table cracks up laughing
Fart jokes for the win.
So I'm considering throwing my hat out of the dating ring. I really like this barbie doll type American.
My Question to YOU is: What is better? The Single Life, or the Married Life?
How old are you, Frog
I'm 25, 4 years out of University.
Longest relationship I've been in was 5 years- a couple years in college, a few years out of college.
I've been enjoying the single life for the last year but it had me realizing exactly what is the point of dating.
I think dating is the means, and marriage is the end goal.
I've been able to meet and understand people from many backgrounds and personalities and I think it's just time for me to stop fucking around and decide what I want.
obligatory post to continue the thread.
Reminds me of Creed :'(
can I win
^May I win?
I love the ratio of Frog to everyone else in this. Its epic
Intellectual growth comes from discussions, not arguments. If you are unwilling to change your position and hear the other persons side you are closed minded and wasting your time.
If you can not clearly explain what the other sides reasoning is you can not disagree with their position because you do not understand it.
filller take off post