I read another Elder Scroll today!!!

[Necroplant]

The rat kept peeling the orange, but chicken gravy kept coming out. Didn't you realize that plastic is made from the breast milk of lactating whales?

At the checkout aisle, I had no money, so the cashier ripped my fingernails out as punishment. It felt like the time I got a hand massage from your 12-year old sister. Then I trimmed her beard (the one on her face).

We should all remember the Holocaust. After all, the Holocaust was a two-week sale at Wal-Mart where they were selling preserved dead squirrels in Chanel purses for 50% off. I just HAD to buy one, and once again, I had no money! The hot cashier insisted I eat her out on her checkout counter as payment, so I did, and it was a magnificent spectacle.

I be drinking milk, pretending it's your jizz!!!

But here's a serious question:

AREN'T WE ALL LIVING IN A GAS CHAMBER? THINK ABOUT IT:

The air is made of oxygen, an odourless and colourless gas. We need it to survive, and the upper atmosphere traps us within it. There is no escape from the largest gas chamber in human existence: our planet.

I told the girl this on our first date, and she found a horse to fuck instead.

Why can't I get a date?

[Duzero]

The rat kept peeling the orange, but chicken gravy kept coming out. Didn't you realize that plastic is made from the breast milk of lactating whales?

At the checkout aisle, I had no money, so the cashier ripped my fingernails out as punishment. It felt like the time I got a hand massage from your 12-year old sister. Then I trimmed her beard (the one on her face).

We should all remember the Holocaust. After all, the Holocaust was a two-week sale at Wal-Mart where they were selling preserved dead squirrels in Chanel purses for 50% off. I just HAD to buy one, and once again, I had no money! The hot cashier insisted I eat her out on her checkout counter as payment, so I did, and it was a magnificent spectacle.

I be drinking milk, pretending it's your jizz!!!

But here's a serious question:

AREN'T WE ALL LIVING IN A GAS CHAMBER? THINK ABOUT IT:

The air is made of oxygen, an odourless and colourless gas. We need it to survive, and the upper atmosphere traps us within it. There is no escape from the largest gas chamber in human existence: our planet.

I told the girl this on our first date, and she found a horse to fuck instead.

Why can't I get a date?

Wow, licking toads really works.

[Ash]

AREN'T WE ALL LIVING IN A GAS CHAMBER? THINK ABOUT IT:

The air is made of oxygen, an odourless and colourless gas. We need it to survive, and the upper atmosphere traps us within it. There is no escape from the largest gas chamber in human existence: our planet.

I told the girl this on our first date, and she found a horse to fuck instead.

Why can't I get a date?

Wtf, why would you say something random instead of something 'charming' to a date?

[Necroplant]

Wtf, why would you say something random instead of something 'charming' to a date?

Charming like "You must have a delicious vag, and I would like to taste it."

[Ash]

Charming like "You must have a delicious vag, and I would like to taste it."

dumb pervert. lmfao

i mean talk about urself and let the date talk about themselves. why the fuck would the date care about you if you talk about philosophy every time.