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Nancy Drew 39
I think I need to work on my social skills more, I didn't mean to offend you. I didn't mean to single you out specifically, and should've emphasized more the general idea that everyone in general can unintentionally miscommunicate or hurt others accidentally. In other words, I meant that your behavior was expected of a typical human being imo. I don't think oyu've had any malice nor was this miscommunication a cause of you simply not caring. A bit of further explanation:
IRL I am a person on the autism spectrum (specifically Asperger's Syndrome before it was moved into the spectrum), and that meant that I grew up with developmental difficulties in socializing. This isn't say I am trying to excuse any of my behaviors -- they're not excusable. Hurt is hurt, pain is pain regardless if its excused or not. To quote a line I like to keep in mind "...now nobody intended it, but that's what happened". Since I've had more difficulties than others I've made communicating effectively and understanding effectively one of my focuses in life. Eventually I got preety good at doing that, or at least enough to be fully functional in life with respect to socializing, but I soon discovered that a lot of people take communication for granted. They will make mistakes and this is because communication is actually a challenging thing to do. Its very difficult to get it right for most people, and that includes people who aren't autistic. The best way to avoid that is to not take communication skills for granted, but even so one will still make mistakes here or there just as I have made mistakes to you today.
This overall has taught me that some people will just naturally cause offense and without just trying to instruct the whole world on social interactions (which might as well seem very condescending since people take communication for granted), and so I typically accept what happens and then move on. There's also the whole other side of the coin, in which a person much perceive offense in order to be offended. This has happened to me a few times as well, where I felt offended (and perhaps wrongly so) just because someone used a different wording with the same definitive meaning of a common phrase. Had the used the more common wording, I wouldn't have felt offense in those cases at all, so it feels weird to say I would be offended with a similar wording. Humans are complex beings and in order to make communication happen a lot goes on with the brain and different organs of the body. However Humans can be fallible, and honestly, humans having the ability to even sometimes communicate effectively and without offense is a preety significant evolutionary achievement because so many things had to be evolved in order to make that work.
I don't hold any ill will to you (or anyone else in this game for that matter), and was just trying to communicate to Ikarus that idea. I clearly did not achieve that though when I used you as a topic instead of referring to people in general.
As for wondering about what offenses you've caused to me, I don't really recall anything super specific or significant. Like I said, it was more of a general feel of potential abrasion than anything bad or hurtful to me. I think as far as recent stuff goes its just this:
...Which felt like blaming me? I may have misread that one. The other one I can think of was this snippet from a larger post:
Early into the day I tried to emphasize everyone has played well regardless of who wins here. You stating this kinda felt like you didn't care about that idea as much, and so it made me concerned if you were abrasive. Nobody likes being blamed for a loss, y'know. But I do realize you're a very emotional player and were probably just trying to vent somehow here. I didn't bring it up earlier because I figured it would be best for everyone if I didn't, and just tried to re-emphasize my ideas later.
Both of these "mistakes" though I honestly find other people making accidentally. Heck if I were frustrated at the game myself, I may have even made these messages myself.