Listen along
[BALLADEER]
Someone tell the story
Someone sing the song
Every now and then
The website
Goes a little wrong
Every now and then
A madman's
Bound to come along
Doesn't stop the forum—
forum's pretty strong
Doesn't change the song...
Rachyl Weiss was a handsome angel
Got up in the robes and bible quotes
Had her a temper but kept it level
We all called her Rachyl
Why did you do it, Rachyl?
Nobody agrees
You, who had everything
What made you try to bring
A forum to its knees?
Some say it was your brain had gone
Some say it was booze
Some say you killed your reputation
Because of bad reviews
Rachyl lived with a grace and glitter
Kind of like the lives she lived online
Banned on the forum loud and bitter
Doesn't matter if she donates
Why did you do it, Rachyl
Throw it all away?
Why did you do it, boy
Not just destroy
The pride and test
Of Arsonist
But all of Circlejerk
Jesus made you jealous, Rachyl?
You couldn't fill his shoes
Was that the reason, tell us, Rachyl—
Along with bad reviews?
[RACHYL, spoken]
Damn!
[HYPERSNIPER, spoken]
They're coming! They'll be here any minute—
[RACHYL, spoken]
I need your help
I've got to type this and I can't hold the keyboard
[HYPERSNIPER, spoken]
Rachyl, they've found us! We've got to get out of here!
[RACHYL]
No! I have to make my case!
And I need you to take it down!
[HYPERSNIPER, spoken]
We don't have time!
[RACHYL, spoken]
Take it down!
An indictment.
Of the Reprobate of Sc2mafia, Stealthbomber16, who is herein charged with the following High Crimes and Misdemeanors
[BALLADEER, sung]
They say you're ship was sinkin', Rachyl...
[RACHYL, spoken]
One:
That you did ruthlessly provoke a war of religion, which cost some six hundred thousand of everyone's brain cells their lives
Two—
[BALLADEER, sung]
You'd started missing cues...
[RACHYL, spoken]
Two:
That you did silence your critics in the forum, by trying to use facts or logic without being religious
Three—
[BALLADEER, sung]
They say it wasn't Stealthbomber...
[RACHYL, spoken]
Shut up! Three—
[BALLADEER]
You'd merely had a slew of bad reviews—
[RACHYL, spoken]
I said shut up! Retard!
[CRYPTONIC, spoken, offstage]
Rachyl! I have fifty soldiers out here, Rachyl! Give yourselves up or we'll set fire to the account!
[HYPERSNIPER, spoken]
Don't shoot! I'm coming out!
[RACHYL, spoken]
No!
[To balladeer]
I have given my life for one act, you understand?
Do not let the mods rob me of its meaning.
Pass on the truth! You're the only one who can
Please...
[BALLADEER, sung]
He said
"Damn you, Arrow
You had your way—
[RACHYL, sung]
Tell 'em, boy!
[BALLADEER]
With replays drawn out
Of damn gameplay!"
[RACHYL]
Tell it all!
Tell them till they listen!
[BALLADEER]
He said
"Damn you, Arrow
And damn the day
You threw SC2 out
Of MAFIA"
He said:
[RACHYL]
Hunt me down, smear my name
Say I did it for the fame
What I did was harass the man who hurt my feelings
Now Christianity will mend
Now this bloody account can end
Because someone slew the tyrant
Just as Coast had slew the tyrant—
[BALLADEER]
He said:
[BALLADEER, RACHYL]
Damn you, Arrow!
You righteous whore!
[RACHYL]
Tell 'em!
Tell 'em what he did!
[BALLADEER, RACHYL]
You turned your spite into banning more!
[RACHYL]
Tell 'em!
Tell 'em the truth!
[BALLADEER]
And more...
[RACHYL]
Tell 'em, boy!
Tell 'em how it happened
How the end doesn't mean that it's over
Account deletion is not the end!
Tell 'em:
How the forum is not what it was
Where there's satan in the posts
How the forum can never again
Be the light that it was
How the sins may never be healed
How the satan is forever
How we gave up the game
But still the oppression came
How the forum can never recover
From that vulgar
High and mighty
SATAN LOVER,
NEVER—!
Never. Never. Never
No, the forum is not what it was...
Ban my name if you must
Let my Account turn to dust
Let it mingle with the ashes of the forum
Let them ban me to hell
Leave it to history to tell:
What I did, I did well
And I did it for christianity
Let them cry, "Stupid reprobate"
They will understand it when things get late—
The forum is not what it was...
[RACHYL types a message asking for her account to be deleted. Gunshot sounds.]