Didn't think I was ever gonna post something like this, but AAmirus said to so here we are.
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  1. #1

    weed Didn't think I was ever gonna post something like this, but AAmirus said to so here we are.

    As of today I am 6 weeks sober. Most of the regulars I played with already know this, but most of the time I was playing Mafia, I was at least 4 beers deep. It's something you don't even really consider a problem, just part of daily routine until something happens. Getting banned from the game I love was a real wake up call and I realized the sauce unleashed a bunch of hate towards a bunch of innocent mafia players, so even though I'm here sober and I still hate Altech, I never really considered the impact on the good mafia playing people, and I think that's what AA was trying to make me realize all this time. After being able to look back and reflect on everything since I can't play the game, I've really been able to see the game from the eyes of the other 50% of the playerbase that aren't regulars and just regular people playing the game.

    And to all those people lynched randomly, or insulted for being dense by me I apologize to you guys. To me I was just having fun, but to you, you guys weren't having fun and in a game it's important for everyone to be having fun, not just some at others expense.

    The fact that random people I've never interacted with or though I had interacted with have a problem with me is evidence enough of the problem.

    I'm not expecting anything out of this, I just needed to apologize to all the people hurt by my alcoholism, so that I can carry on and continue with my life in a healthier manner.

    Thanks Aa for helping me realize that I needed to do this, sorry for all the trouble I caused you guys too.

    Sober Man, out.
    The only townie good enough to get banned for game-throwing in games that he wins.

  2. #2

    Re: Didn't think I was ever gonna post something like this, but AAmirus said to so here we are.

    Quote Originally Posted by ZZorange View Post
    As of today I am 6 weeks sober. Most of the regulars I played with already know this, but most of the time I was playing Mafia, I was at least 4 beers deep. It's something you don't even really consider a problem, just part of daily routine until something happens. Getting banned from the game I love was a real wake up call and I realized the sauce unleashed a bunch of hate towards a bunch of innocent mafia players, so even though I'm here sober and I still hate Altech, I never really considered the impact on the good mafia playing people, and I think that's what AA was trying to make me realize all this time. After being able to look back and reflect on everything since I can't play the game, I've really been able to see the game from the eyes of the other 50% of the playerbase that aren't regulars and just regular people playing the game.

    And to all those people lynched randomly, or insulted for being dense by me I apologize to you guys. To me I was just having fun, but to you, you guys weren't having fun and in a game it's important for everyone to be having fun, not just some at others expense.

    The fact that random people I've never interacted with or though I had interacted with have a problem with me is evidence enough of the problem.

    I'm not expecting anything out of this, I just needed to apologize to all the people hurt by my alcoholism, so that I can carry on and continue with my life in a healthier manner.

    Thanks Aa for helping me realize that I needed to do this, sorry for all the trouble I caused you guys too.

    Sober Man, out.
    That's cool man. I'm also never in a good spot when playing games.
    "The child must have a valuable thing which is called imagination. The child must have a secret world in which live things that never were. It is necessary that he believe. He must start out believing in things not of this world. Then, when the world becomes too ugly for living in, the child can reach back and live in his imagination. I, myself, even in this day and age, have great need of this. Only by having imagination in my mind can I live beyond what I have to live for.”

  3. #3

  4. #4

  5. #5

  6. #6

    Re: Didn't think I was ever gonna post something like this, but AAmirus said to so here we are.

    Only a true honest man could be so honest with himself.
    Quote Originally Posted by S-FM Unfunny View Post
    How dare you send me another box of cereal
    Quote Originally Posted by aamirus View Post
    congrats you're an inspiration to pedophiles everywhere
    Quote Originally Posted by SuperJack View Post
    You're favourite toast spread is sawdust
    Quote Originally Posted by Yuesford View Post
    I'm sure.. 100% clownbomber16 is scum. I'll suck my own dick if I'm wrong.

  7. #7

  8. #8

  9. #9

    Re: Didn't think I was ever gonna post something like this, but AAmirus said to so here we are.

    Again, this two-faced liar proves time and time again that he's not worth trusting. Look, I'm glad you're getting help and treatment in your personal life. However, when you sign off with

    Quote Originally Posted by ZZorange View Post
    Sober Man, out.
    but then later reply as post #5, you didn't really "out". It's very disingenuous and incredibly misleading.

  10. #10

    Re: Didn't think I was ever gonna post something like this, but AAmirus said to so here we are.

    You are right HentaiMan I have been a liar and I'm sorry for the way it has impacted you, you deserve far better. I'm going to continue to try to do better for people like you. God bless.
    Last edited by ZZorange; July 21st, 2021 at 08:15 PM.
    The only townie good enough to get banned for game-throwing in games that he wins.

  11. #11

    Re: Didn't think I was ever gonna post something like this, but AAmirus said to so here we are.

    Quote Originally Posted by ZZorange View Post
    You are right HentaiMan I have been a liar and I'm sorry for the way it has impacted you, you deserve far better. I'm going to continue to try to do better for people like you. God bless.
    I strongly recommend going forward you sign off with "God bless" or something of that nature. That way, you don't confuse others as autistic as I am. Thank you.

  12. #12

    Re: Didn't think I was ever gonna post something like this, but AAmirus said to so here we are.

    Quote Originally Posted by ZZorange View Post
    And to all those people lynched randomly, or insulted for being dense by me I apologize to you guys. To me I was just having fun, but to you, you guys weren't having fun and in a game it's important for everyone to be having fun, not just some at others expense.
    Don't worry bud. A lot of people are having fun playing with you, including me. Things are bland rn. I asked people around in PM and from another mod (keystone, dm 2.0, ks2, etc.) what they'd think about the system. I don't want to talk about it here. But you, getting permabanned also sealed the deal. No one makes a 72222 save and other fun saves are always initiated a leave train by some people cos it wasn't 933/8331. So yeah, don't worry about it. We had 6 months of fun. Also, Taeja and Innovation are also retiring from the pro scenes, funny coincidence. LOLOL. Only returned in sc2 cos of fuckin Avilo being creepy again.
    Last edited by Yuesford; July 22nd, 2021 at 02:12 AM.
    What I got for my 18th Birthday

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ

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  14. #14

    Re: Didn't think I was ever gonna post something like this, but AAmirus said to so here we are.

    Quote Originally Posted by ZZorange View Post
    You are right HentaiMan I have been a liar and I'm sorry for the way it has impacted you, you deserve far better. I'm going to continue to try to do better for people like you. God bless.
    I liked you better when you were alcoholic
    Not sure what impact it had on your real life - but online, it wasn't that bad.
    Quote Originally Posted by Huey The Long View Post
    Naz will die, i can promise you this, i visited there home, i shared the wealth, placed my book on their nightstand and said every man a king 3 times so they will die from my glorious contagion of my political program
    Quote Originally Posted by Blinkstorteddd02 View Post
    You sure you dont want to lynch Voss again? he may flip scum this time.
    Quote Originally Posted by Distorted View Post
    mags my highest townread and i think hes scum.
    Quote Originally Posted by GoatseOntheCupboard View Post
    NOT TOWN = NOT INNOCENT

  15. #15

    Re: Didn't think I was ever gonna post something like this, but AAmirus said to so here we are.

    Quote Originally Posted by ZZorange View Post
    most of the time I was playing Mafia, I was at least 4 beers deep. It's something you don't even really consider a problem, just part of daily routine
    This is why I had to scale back: Gaming and drinking always had a "co-morbidity" kind of effect. It was enjoyable doing one when I was also doing the other.

    Breaking a gaming routine is easy. Breaking a drinking routine - with a literally physically and psychologically addictive substance - was hard.

    I was never a heavy drinker, but not being able to stop day-to-day, even when I wanted to... was terrifying.

    I still drink, but make an occasion of going out to buy it from the grocery store. And I never stock up. If it's in the house, it gets consumed just to get my money's worth. And if it's getting consumed, you can bet I won't be doing anything productive during.

  16. #16

    Re: Didn't think I was ever gonna post something like this, but AAmirus said to so here we are.

    Quote Originally Posted by OzyWho View Post
    @theoneceko feels like it's been a while since I last saw. Are you feeling better than before?
    My mental health has gradually been getting better for a few years. I’ve also been seeing a therapist. Recovery is a slow road that’s full of highs and lows, but I’m slowly getting there.
    Last edited by theoneceko; July 24th, 2021 at 12:51 AM.
    "The child must have a valuable thing which is called imagination. The child must have a secret world in which live things that never were. It is necessary that he believe. He must start out believing in things not of this world. Then, when the world becomes too ugly for living in, the child can reach back and live in his imagination. I, myself, even in this day and age, have great need of this. Only by having imagination in my mind can I live beyond what I have to live for.”

 

 

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