My names Rachyl. Most of you have seen me in SC2mafia or here on the Forums, but to all who don't know me, Hi im Rachyl.
I struggle with schizophrenia, anxiety, and depression.
Living with these mental illnesses is really really hard. My life is by no means easy. But it has its moments of pure joy. Like when something good happens, right now I feel happy. SC2Mafia is very therapeutic for me to play. It lets me release all my stress and my anger and just have a good game of mafia. I like this game because you can name yourself whoever you want. I can be Rachyl, Michael Jackson, or even Machine Gun Kelly! Its so fun! This game has brought true joy to my life ever since discovering it in 2015. it helps me with my mental illness by keeping me happy and helping me pass the time. I cant wait for October because my birthday is on Halloween. Yes i said it, im a halloween baby. and proud of it. But anyways back to the topic at hand. Schizophrenia can be a scary illness, and lead you to a scary place where you start to question what is real and what is unreal (fantasy). I take medication for my illness, and I get a shot of haldol decanoate each month which helps with the illness. sometimes i see scary faces in the wall. but i have to tell myself that theres nothing there. Soon, i will be inheriting a lot of money. I intend to store up as much money into the bank as possible and save it for a rainy day, or if theres something I really want. Next is depression. Now the depression can suck really bad because i get sad. Oh and by the way it doesn't help when players in mafia tell me to kill myself in real life, because that actually makes me sad and makes me want to kill myself. By the way for all you who say such things to me, you should be ashamed of yourselves because it shows how immature and cowardly you are. You know who you are. Who tells a girl to kill themselves, like, seriously what the hell is wrong with you people? But you know what pisses me off the most about mafia is when you genuinely have a lead, and the town instead of going off of your lead, they vote you up instead. Its sooooo dumb. I hate that. Anyways. Next is anxiety. Have you ever felt panicked and didnt know what to do? Thats exactly what anxiety is like! You feel like your hyperventilating and cant breathe. i take medication for that too. I think its called melatonin. Oh and for depression I take zoloft. Which makes me feel like a zombie which is why when Im playing mafia sometimes, i drool over my keyboard and die. and then im so zombied out that i forgot to write a last will. sorry about that. I try my best to play the game. I know i gamethrow sometimes but i dont really mean to. After all. the players on mafia are straight up vicious and cutthroat. Players will do and say whatever they have to do to win. Its a bloodthirsty game, it really is. But thats why this game is so fun. Dont be surpised if you get namecalled after you namecall me. because i dont take shit from anyone. And if your a witchhunter you are a loser. Lol like seriously. Some of you join the game just to prefer jailor and kill me whenever you see my name. Thats why ive been naming myself Michael Jackson lately so no one even notices im in the game. Anyways. back to the mental illness thing......When october 10th comes around it will be World Mental Health awareness day, so i will be coming back here to the forums to talk about mentall illness and spread awareness to everyone. my message is is that there is help out there for you. you just need to reach out and people will help you. dont ever kill yourself. thats a bad idea. I know ive kind of ranted but I just felt like venting. I enjoy talking to you guys and playing games with most of you. So far ive made alot of Starcraft friends. Balthy, Distorted, Kira. You guys are all great and i love you. Especially Balthy. hes been so kind and nice to me. I would do anything to see you guys smile for me. I just want to be happy in this life and not have to be depressed. And thank you Dark Revenant for all the good times and the benefactor status. One thing im looking forwards to in the future is cooking new food. Aand possibly hosting my own FMs. (it would be nice if someone taught me how to do that) and most importantly. Im a christian first. And i know someone accused me of not being very-christian the other day. But you guys need to understand that im only human and im responding as a human. We live in a fallen world and we are inhabited by sin. and the Apostle Paul himself even said at one point that in his flesh dwelleth no good thing. I read and study the bible alot. So if your an atheist i am the perfect person to talk to if you are trying to make it to Heaven(in christianity we call it getting Saved and washed in the blood) theres only one way to heaven. and its through the Lord Jesus Christ. I know what your thinking......Gods not real. What has he ever done for me? or, praise Satan! But i want you to ask yourself this question. Are you willing to gamble your eternity in the Lake of Fire by not accepting Jesus Christ? He loves you. God is willing that none should perish and that all should come to repentance the bible says. and the bible says that the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God, is eternal life through Jesus Christ. Anyways i know ive kind of ranted but im just trying to pack as much useful information into this post as possible. I love you all! -Rachyl <3