AND SHE SAID YES!!!
Jk, she refused me casually, and I stammered like I had turrets syndrome because it was the first time I'd tried to ask a girl out. However - do not fret dear friend! For I have an infallible solution to this issue!
I have calculated the chances of her saying yes (including scenarios where she is partially misguided by drugs or has a tongue slip) to be approximately 2%. This may seem low, but I have a mathematical solution to guarantee success: With one attempt, my chances stand at 2%. But 2 attempts? Well, well, well! My calculator puts that at a whopping 3.96% chance! And 3 attempts? By golly, that's an incredible 5.88% chance! In fact, a mere 20 attempts yields a vast 33.23% success rate! That's almost a third! With this approach, success is guaranteed if I can get enough attempts before a restraining order takes place, or some big beefy boyfriend steps in.
Mattzed, it would be greatly appreciated if you could review my statistical analysis, if you read this post. And, I'd be grateful if someone shared rejection tales and/or advice.